Missing

In our house there is a definite silence that is not normal. My three stepchildren have gone for the week to spend time with their "mother." She hasn't spoken to them or seen them in the last four months but since the arrival of her newest baby she suddenly has a new interest in my children. I know that by birth I'm not their mother but in duties I am. I am the one who bathes the boys, washes clothes, feeds them, makes sure they have a warm meal, and all those other motherly duties. I joke with the girls at work by saying that I only had to go through one pregnancy but in the end I got four children. I know that I can never replace their mother but she ran off, gave up custodial rights, and left them. Today Bre and I had to run Spencer's car seat to his maternal grandmother's house and I really saw how much she loves them and misses them when they are not at home with us.

After leaving the children and exchanging hugs it was no more than five minutes later that I glance over and notice that my biological child was crying. She was crying real tears, yes real ones, because she wanted to turn around and take her step siblings home with us. This was astonishing to me because I've always secretly wondered what feeling she harboured for these children. In my mind I've always felt that she loved them but wished that she were an only child again but here it was tears that said she loved them and missed them.

The house has been quite lonely without my step-children but their week is almost up and they will be returning home soon. We've talked every night and you could hear the longing in their voices to be back home. I'm anxiously waiting to see how that homecoming will be because I know despite the tears and exclamations of wishing the kids were home where they belong I know that Breanna will ultimately eat her words and be a brat for just a minute or two or even a few hours. But deep down I know that she loves them and we are a family. In two weeks we are off the West Virginia for a short vacation. That should be fun!!!!! (I think I'm just a glutton for punishment because the hubby and his father are staying home and letting the ladies handle the children for a week.) I wonder if they will miss us?